What better way to celebrate Valentine’s Day that chatting about… love. Whether you are in a relationship or not, every individual has a way of interpreting and expressing love. Think of all the relationships you have – a significant other, spouse, family members, children and friends, determining your individual love language helps others communicate and express their love to you properly.
In 1995, Gary Chapman outlined the five love languages in his book The 5 Love Languages. The five different languages are, as follows:
- Words of Affirmation. This language is used to affirm other people. If this is your language, you enjoy unsolicited compliments from your partner. Kind, encouraging and positive words mean a lot to you.
- Physical Touch. You enjoy hugs, pats and holding hands with your partner. Physical touch fosters a sense of security and belonging for you.
- Quality Time. Time is a hot commodity in our busy lives but for the person whose love language is quality time, they need uninterrupted time with their partner. Sharing quality conversations and activities goes a long way.
- Receiving Gifts. If you speak this love language, receiving gifts from your partner makes you feel loved and taken care of. Gifts are visual representation of your love.
- Acts of Service. People with this love language enjoy when their partner does anything to lesson their burden of responsibility. Laziness, broken promises and/or commitments and more work for them makes these folks feel like they do not matter.
Can you see what confusion that may bring to a relationship if you do not know your or your significant other’s love language? Imagine your love language is receiving gifts but your partner’s is words of affirmation. You think you are expressing your love by showing up with little gifts but your partner has never heard a word of affirmation from you, making it look like you do not appreciate him/her. Consider ending the miscommunication by taking this short quiz. The results will rank your love language in order of relevance, putting your primary love language at the top. For this Valentine’s Day, provide your loved ones with your love language so they can truly show you how much they love you and you, them!
Liz is broker and owner of Liz Daigle Realty.